Do you sometimes feel frightened, intimidated or controlled by your partner? Or do you constantly have to watch your behaviour in case they get angry?
Do you sometimes feel frightened, intimidated or controlled by your partner? Or do you constantly have to watch your behaviour in case they get angry?
If so you're probably being abused.
Controlling, abusive or violent behaviour is never OK in a relationship. You should feel safe, loved and free to be yourself.
Being hurt emotionally or physically can make you feel bad about yourself. It can also make you feel anxious, depressed or ill.
If it's happening to you, it's important to ask for help.
Talk to a person you trust like a parent or someone else in your family, or a friend. Don't hold it in.
Relationship abuse can happen to young men or women, but it's most likely to happen to girls and young women.
It's more likely to happen to young people in same-sex relationships too.
Abuse can be physical violence like hitting, kicking, pushing, slapping or pressuring you into sex.
But there are also other kinds of abuse.
It's abuse when your partner:
Behaviour like this doesn't mean your partner cares. It's about them controlling you and having power over you.
It's not normal and it's not "just the way things are". It's a serious issue.
It's also a warning. Some people who behave like this become physically violent later on.
Remember, it's not your fault, even if your partner blames you for their behaviour.
And just because you're young doesn't mean it's not abuse.
It can be difficult to find the right words to ask for help.
Try asking someone whether you can talk to them about something. Tell them you need some help. There are things happening that you aren't happy about and you don't know what to do.
You could talk to:
If you're in danger right now, call local emergency services. The police are there to help you stay safe.
If you think a friend is in an abusive relationship, talk to them. Keep calm and try not to judge.
Tell them you're worried about them and ask if everything is OK. Listen to them and let them know that you're there for them.
If they've been hurt, offer to go to the doctor with them.
Perhaps have a helpline number ready to give them.
Your friend might be angry or upset with you to begin with. But they'll know you care and it will encourage them to get help.
If you're abusing your partner or you're worried that you might, you can call a helpline to talk about it.
Realising your behaviour is wrong is the first step. But you may need help to stop.
Important: Our website provides useful information but is not a substitute for medical advice. You should always seek the advice of your doctor when making decisions about your health.